wedding guests inevitably face the age-old question: What to
give the bride and groom? If you're attending a wedding and
thinking about anything that appears on the list below,
please reconsider. Brides told us the worst wedding gifts
they received.
Erring with art
Don't assume that your taste in art is the same as the
couple's -- one person's Picasso is another person's "what
were you thinking?" Here are a few pieces of tragic wedding
present artwork that are sure contenders for "Most Likely to
be Stashed in the Attic":
"A 3-D painting of horses"
"A really ugly art piece involving a cow tooth"
"A ceramic fish statue"
"A hand-painted lucky horseshoe"
"A picture of a wine cork"
"A ceramic angel in a bathtub"
"A hand-blown vase that looks like a hookah"
Cheapskate
The standard wedding etiquette is to spend approximately as
follows: For a coworker or a distant family friend or
relative, try to spend around $50-$75. For a relative or
friend, the ballpark should be about $75-$100, and for a
close relative or close friend, you'll want to spend $100-
$150 or more. But as long as you avoid the skimps below, you
should at least stay on speaking terms.
"A $15 garage rack (we don't even have a garage!)"
"A bottle of vinegar vegetables"
"A mop"
"Dollar-store picture frame with price tag still attached"
"Febreze air freshener"
"Gift card that was empty"
"Mounted can opener with the UPC code removed (so the giver
could get the rebate and we couldn't return it)"
"An IOU"
"Nothing"
Re-gifting is a crime
Nothing says "Congrats on your marriage, but we didn't want
to shell out for a real present" like giving a gift that
someone else has already given you. Here are a few of the
most obvious regift no-nos:
"A regifted tray (with the original card to the regifter
included with the present)"
"A regifted set of wine glasses we'd given our cousin"
"A regifted apple peeler/corer/slicer"
"A regifted gravy boat that was broken"
Incredibly inappropriate
These couples received suggestive wedding gifts could be
taken the wrong way -- without really trying. Avoid these
inappropriate presents, or risk having to explain yourself to
the happily married couple, and in some cases, the bride's
father.
"A book on relationships"
"An emergency survival kit"
"A book called Why Men Love B****es -- I returned it"
"Edible underwear"
"Fertility idol"
Utterly useless
From the redundant to the... er, "unique," here's a list of
gifts that would make better gag gifts than wedding presents.
"Six George Foreman grills"
"A birdhouse made of license plates... we live in a condo!"
"A friend gave us a framed invitation to her own wedding,
which happened about five months before"
"A Jesus night-light"
"A snowman lamp"
"A Bill Clinton pot holder"
"A cinnamon-scented stuffed dog"
"Dueling harmonicas"
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